I hope to stay unemployed as a war photographer till the end of my life. –Robert Capa
That was really become unbearable for me to carry out my job but I was doing for the sake of my family. I was working in a CCM 5 level company as an IT professional, so managing time for my family apart from my hectic schedule was next to impossible. After my marriage, it was more devastating for both of us. Basically I couldn’t manage time for my family as well as for my wife. Marriage brings more responsibilities automatically and it needs time to nurture the relationship. Even most of the time on a week, I was forced to stayed back in office. Sometimes it happened with me that I couldn’t notice my wife even for a week. Slowly in the process I became a money making machine. I got know that my wife started complaining about me to other family members that time. Even after my marriage I couldn’t manage a day for a movie with my wife and never arranged a successful lunch in a restaurant, just forget about the dinner. But I tried several time, even I booked table for us, but at final moment I turned up. Please don’t think, I did it with my wish, it’s also affected me badly. My father could understand me during that time, even he talked to me about it. Sorry to say, even after some time papa also stopped taking to me, even today I don’t know the reason behind it.
In the office, politics was on the higher side but during that time I couldn’t express it to anybody else. Because everybody from my family and those who surrounded with my life, avoided me like anything during that phase. I was found myself in the middle of a boring machine. I gave more emphasize on my job, especially after my marriage, because of extra finance. Prioritized my job first brings promotions for me and there was huge spectrum opened up for me. That’s also brought jealousy among my colleagues about me and as a result, politics against me at office was on high that was really scared me. Every bit and every moments I was so scared during my office hours. To be very honest I am little nervous character and impact of these was affected me tremendously. There was nervous breakdown in me and started developing intoxication. Negligence from family, especially my wife (I didn’t want to blame them, because it was justified) towards me and on other hand politics in the office, I couldn’t not bear the tensions any more.
One day I was sleeping till 8 AM at my Home, so my wife came to me to wake me up. I said to her “Will sleep like this every day from today onwards”. She left the bedroom, again came back to me and said “Tumi ki Pagol hoye gecho” (in English- Are you gone mad). I whispered to her, I left my job. She smiled and cried like anything. I can’t express the entire scenario in words. I asked her, are you really happy that I am jobless? She smiled and told me that when God sent us, he will do something for us. She said again “feeling like happiest woman in the earth”. Oh my God I couldn’t forget the moment and the day when I left my job, it was 9th of July 2013. We spend the day as we planned before our marriage. Even today when I close my eyes I can see the entire day like a movie.
The attitude showed by my wife after become jobless, it was a really inspiring for me and saw a new hope to start a fresh. Now I am into freelancing of IT Projects and have plenty of time to spend with my family. Now I can attain any social gathering and all thanks to my family from the core of my heart.
Now I am more confident and a completely different personality just because of that day and till the last breath of my life I will not forget about the day. It gave me hope and optimism towards start a new phase of life. I feel the same optimism and hope with @Housing, it added more colours of hope into my life and I am sure it will pour more colours into your life too.